Heroic life or heroic death

The inability to do the ordinary leads us to an extraordinary dichotomy.

“I shall be great or nothing at all”, said the man. It’s amazing how often this sentiment has appeared across time, both in reality and works of literature, for as Oliver Wendell Holmes believed, “nothing is so commonplace as to wish to be remarkable.” And he is not wrong, in my opinion. The specifics may alter, but the sheer amount of people whose deeds they want seen, heard and revered by the masses, only seems to be getting larger by the day. The only question is – are we really prepared to do what is necessary to achieve such feats or is it nothing more than a dream?

The modern approach to living likes to tell us that we’re all great, beautiful and incredible human beings, but the truth is we’re not, really. As I discussed last week, the “you can be anything you want/achieve anything” way of thinking or fantasy, has a tendency to not have the desired result and keep people in more of limbo stage. You can see this “fantasy” play out in society in numerous illustrations. For instance, the shortcut everything crowd with their array of life hacks, body hacks etc. for any and all situations to have you beating the competition and life as well. Similarly, we can become superhuman by taking this or adding that or, the latest, using AI to turbocharge your entire existence. We have everyday examples surrounding work and study such as “sign up, study here and be a world leader”, or “fast track your CEO career progress…”, or everyone’s favourite, the new year gym membership that’ll have you looking like Arnold in a matter of months.

The problem with all these is that it gives an illusion of easiness to the path of greatness, and the perception of its timeframe. I’ll be a world leader or nothing, I’ll be a CEO or nothing, I’ll be Arnold or nothing; these heroic fantasies take on a “life or death” philosophy because the drab and dreary work required to make these fantasies a reality is not appealing, not in the slightest, along with the complete absence in acknowledging the role of luck in all this. No, these people can’t do the mundane, the boring, the ordinary.  

“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On!' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.” – Former US President, Calvin Coolidge.

However, these people aren’t really searching for persistence. They long to be tested. These are the types of people who, if the apocalypse started tomorrow, they’d be thrilled as they’d (finally) have a chance to be a hero or die – something which the opportunity or circumstance to facilitate such chance to demonstrate their prowess (or lack thereof) is sorely lacking in their current lives. The ordinary is beneath them, so it leaves them with an extraordinary either/or. These people have a tendency to half-ass life because they believe they’re meant for more/greater things. You can’t be great if you’re content. Progress can’t be enough because I’ll stop wanting, and if I stop wanting, I’ll be content, which means I can’t be great. Greatness is the continual desire for excellence. The “genius” is never content.

That’s half the trouble; a lot of these people are severely disappointed with life. Their vision/fantasy of what life should be doesn’t line up with reality. However, instead of adjusting the vision, the longing for their fantasy intensifies (or their adaptation to reality is done in abstract). Their idealism doesn’t measure up when engaging with life which leads to a decrease in motivation, no initiation in activity, procrastination or becoming dejected. Inevitably they falter, fail to deliver or live up to expectations (but they don’t want help). They have a strong inclination to blame past versions of themselves, but in a strange way, they don’t change yet continue to blame themselves. This can give them an out to not commit to what is needed, which is usually mundane, boring work. This is where the problem of the perpetual loading zone I was talking about last week comes in, the cycle repeats itself.

Every time they try to move forward in life they are disappointed. So, they become terrified of moving forward and being disappointed and trapped, thus, a need for escape/freedom. There is this strong belief that in the perfect circumstances their perfection will come out, which leads them on a hunt for these perfect circumstances to bring this out (over and over again). The craving for a “miraculous cure”, usually something extraordinarily fantastical to fix their life woes, or just to suffer – won’t do the hard work, but achievement, success, “heroism” etc. requires an excessive amount of drab and dreary work.

Photo by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash.

We can see two things happen: 1) Absolution of responsibility – e.g. blame past self so I can’t do anything about it now, and 2) Amputation of desire – essentially a cutting off or repressing a part of the self rather than work through or find another way which has an affinity to end in cynicism, nihilism, resentment and bitterness.

Learning to delay gratification, to not aim to satisfy every immediate impulsive whim, goes a long way to keeping this extraordinary dichotomy at bay. Temptation is always at the gate, at every stage, waiting for you to give in, trying to seduce you to give up the true and proper path. You have to steel yourself, prepare, maintain, be ready when the opportunity arises and then have the courage to undertake what’s necessary in spite of the adversity and fear. It’s not about falsely elevating the boring to the level of the brave, but giving it its proper place and value. The heroic life involves a multitude of regular everyday events. We need to integrate the routine, the dull, the mundane, into the adventure of our lives rather than discard it as something we can do without.

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