Why we’re all so endlessly tired
- Martyn Foster
- Oct 24
- 4 min read
Stress, costs, change, fighting, permanently wired…anything else?
It’s no surprise to see so many people running on fumes. However, just because we see a lot of something or it seems accepted as a part of modern living, it doesn’t make it right or a good thing. Much like how at the beginning of “Top Gun” when Cougar is running way low on gas, flying on vapours essentially, and would have crashed into the sea if he didn’t land immediately, instead, many people continue to push the needle into the red risking harm or death to themselves and others.
Now, I know some people will counter this with the “I’m doing this out of necessity”, like some sort get out of jail free card from monopoly. To which I say that is precisely the point, and it’s usually at this point which some level of intervention is needed to prevent a march towards an early grave. Everyone knows that stress is the biggest killer, yet few people seem to want to do the necessary things to ameliorate it. Or, more to the point, people feel they’re living so much out of necessity rather than want, that they have no control or agency to reengineer or reconstruct their lives for the better. You have more agency than you believe to enact change.
“A person lacking hope will not have their tiredness replenished by sleep.”
Unfortunately, I’m not the government or God, I cannot give you the illusion of waving my magic wand and fixing all the problems of the world. Nor will I echo some empty platitude like “we’re all in this together”, when we aren’t and no one is really helping one another. We get up and we’re tired. We go to work and we’re tired. We go to sleep and we’re tired. It’s forever chasing us.
To return to stress for a moment, and it is a very stressful time for a lot of people for various legitimate reasons, I’m well aware that not everyone has someone to help them through these things. The old saying of “a problem shared is a problem halved” is difficult to actualise in a loneliness epidemic. This is for single people as much as those who feel alone in a relationship. Relationships are a lot like moving a sofa, it’s difficult to do it by yourself, and even more so when the other person is asleep on it.
“The costs we’re paying out of a wallet are easier to quantify than the costs we’re paying with our minds and bodies.”
The cost-of-living crisis has led people to dramatically reevaluate how they live or to continue pushing through out of necessity. Housing, both affordability and availability, is on a lot of people’s minds, leading to many difficult discussions (or arguments) and sleepless nights. We see the good, the bad, and the ugly of people’s desperation under such circumstances.
Change, is it happening too fast or not enough? I’m sure there’s a number of people in either corner, but this can no doubt add to our restlessness as we either think the world is going mad or passing us by, or frustration at its ability to change direction about as fast as an oil tanker. Like with a lot of things about change, we’d like them immediately, preferably without too much effort, but rarely that’s how it’s done in reality and sometimes we must learn to practice delayed gratification. How do you do so nowadays with so many artificially jigging the system for their own personal gain? We are tired of corruption. We are tired of incompetent, bad actors in high places. We are tired of yet another reason why we’re wrong.
Fighting tends to make us tired because it uses up a lot of energy, that’s why we usually only do it for short bursts or we withdraw away. When fighting goes on for a long time we see a lot of things break down. Of course, I’m talking as much about actual wars as I am about things on a more individual and relational level, even online. I’ve talked at length previously about our increasing hostility towards one another and lack of civility, so I don’t wish to labour the point, but it seems when people haven’t had enough in the real world, they take it onto the internet and continue it there. 24/7/365 fighting – anyone, anywhere, anytime. It’s almost like being permanently wired is making us more prone to it, and certainly more tired.
This state of being constantly connected – be it for work or private use – is overstimulating us to the point of exhaustion. Here in Australia, we had the “Right to Disconnect” legislation passed last year where: “Employees have the right to refuse employer or third-party contact outside working hours in some circumstances.” The internet and emails/messages, especially with the accessibility on mobile devices, have found their ways into people’s lives to be exploited beyond what’s considered reasonable – this whole idea that we must respond to work outside of work is driving even more tiredness. Not to mention, the sheer amount of personal use that people derive from such devices.
Keeping up with the news – you can see how a lot of these things are interrelated – made easier and inescapable thanks to technology, has become a barrage, an onslaught, directed more to attract eyeballs and inflame emotions than inform us. I was going to do a separate article on the downfall of quality journalism, but I will mention it here and why it’s related. Not knowing what or who you can trust is tiring. Endlessly tiring. Wading through the endless chaff to get to the wheat is tiring. Getting bullshitted to on a regular basis; people get tired of that really quickly!
“Just because you display your emotions doesn't mean you understand your emotions. In an emotionally immature and insecure society this is difficult to understand and tiring for those who do.”
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I totally resonate with this article Martyn, especially “A person lacking hope will not have their tiredness replenished by sleep.” At times I feel so depleted of hope and I get so tired BUT one has to try and soldier on and find some positivity in each and every day...........otherwise, what is the point of living? Mum X